With all due apologies to the band and J.R.R. Tolkien

The Gold Hall of Edoras
On the dark road from Orthanc, leechcraft on my mind
Wouldn't have to betray them if they weren't so unkind
Up ahead on the high hill, I saw the shimmering Hall
My thoughts grow wicked and my cold sore hurts. One day I'll show them all!
There she stood on the front steps -- I heard the horses neigh
And I was thinking to myself "I've got to find out how to win her someday."
Then she turned and looked at me, stormy eyes were so cold
The Rohirrim rode up to the gate on their steeds so bold

Welcome to the Gold Hall of Edoras
Such a desperate place, such a lonely face
Plenty intrigue at the Gold Hall of Edoras
Any time of year we're devoid of cheer

Theoden's mind I have twisted so to my cunning he'll bend
I tell him that the wizard Saruman has ever been Rohan's friend
How my lady despairs now, locked in her cage
Some days she's the king's nurse, some days she's his page
Soon I'll call her aside, say, "Please listen, my dear:
Your spirit would be happier if you came with me from here"
And still that Eomer thinks he can have his say
So I thought up a few lies to tell and had him dragged away

Welcome to the Gold Hall of Edoras
Such a desperate place, such a lonely face
I'm laying my plots in the Gold Hall of Edoras
Won't they be surprised to meet my allies!

Whispers in the king's ear, poison in his cup
And he said, "I'm so old and tired I might as well just give up"
And all across the Marches they are chasing orcish bands
They fight them with their steely swords but they just can't stop the Hand

Last thing I remember I saw Gandalf at the door
I tried to slip right out of there but they threw me to the floor
"Relax," said Theoden, "I will give you horse and tack.
You can set out anywhere you like but you must not come back!"