More LORD OF THE RINGS silliness

Who's the prettiest?

Rejected Merchandising Ideas for Lord of the Rings

5) Mount Doom Garbage Can: "Now you can throw your trash into a firey crack, just like Frodo plans to do with the One Ring!"

4) Chia Troll: "Just add water and watch moss and vines overtake these once-frightening monsters! But don't touch the planter, or *you'll* turn to stone, too!"

3) Fifty Simple Things You Can Do To Save Middle-Earth, by Legolas Greenleaf: "#27: Always recycle your arrows ..."

2) Prancing Pony Supersized Stein: "Your friends' eyes will pop out as they ask, 'It comes in 44 oz.?' Great for ale *or* grape soda pop!"

1) The One Ring: "Startle your friends! Get out of tight spots! Slowly turn into a hideous shadow of your former self!" (Author's note: I realize you can buy a replica of the One Ring. I'm talking about the one that caused all the trouble.)

Of Elves, Vikings and Sleep